Best Funny Animal Jokes

Contains funny animal jokes and dirty one liners that will have you in stitches.

Jan

Private Number Plates

By Dave

in Animal Jokes

+15 -61

I can’t afford private number plates so I’ve decided to change my name to v16 5uw.

Jun

Freezer

By PollyA

in Animal Jokes, Relationship Jokes

Tags: Wife Jokes

+7 -55

My wife shouted at me today for forgetting to take the lamb out the freezer. Sadly it couldn’t withstand the freezing temperatures and died after a couple of hours.

Dec

New Puppy

By Dave

in Animal Jokes

+28 -83

Just got back home from holiday and my new puppy has caused a lot of problems. It shat everywhere, ripped all the furniture and then starved to death.

Dec

Long Face

By RobinB

in Animal Jokes

+28 -96

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, “Why the long face?”. The horse turns to him and says, “My wife is dying of terminal cancer.”