Just changed my Facebook name to ‘benefits’ so when you add me it says ‘You are now friends with benefits’.
Why is my wiener the perfect gentleman? Because it always stands up to give a woman somewhere to sit.
Yo mama is so fat when she goes out walking in high heels she comes home in flip-flops.
Yo mama is so fat, she can’t even jump to conclusions.
Q. What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Adolf Hitler?
A. Usain bolt can Finish a race.
Q. Why do they name hurricanes after women? A. Because when they arrive they are wet and wild but when they leave they take your house and car with them.